Emotional Bondage

'A slave should be in a continued state of bondage, from the chain locked around her neck, to the chains or cage in which she sleeps overnight, she is captive to her master.' (Doghouse).

I remember finding that quote on a Master/slave website. It set me thinking about the types of bondage at play (no pun intended) in Master/slave relationships. Here are some of my thoughts:

The physical bondage in the quote serves to remind the slave of her status. That she is 'owned'. However, as vulnerable and helpless as physical bonds may make her feel, they are nothing compared to the emotional bonds which serve to attatch her to the one who owns her. The psychological and emotional bonds by which a slave is inexplicably bound to the Master are far stronger than chains and ropes.

When one person becomes reliant, in a relationship, on the authority and decision making of another there are serious concerns regarding such dependency. What if anything should happen to the Master, what becomes of the slave? Is she able to cope and adjust well to life without the decision maker? Yes, practicalities can be learned and overcome, after all she survived a life prior to being owned. The main cause for concern, however, is what happens to the emotional bonds formed through an ongoing Master/slave relationship should things go wrong?

Dependency, at this level, has serious implications for the slave. The emotional ties which also affect the Master cannot be denied, but for the slave, the dependency issues are far greater.

How can such strong bonds be dissolved, without having serious and possibly longlasting and even destructive consequences for the slave? Such tight emotional bonds are intrinsically part of a Master/slave relationship. For all authority and power to be deferred to one person in this way means that both parties become transparent to one another. Ultimately if a Master leaves a slave bound, ropes can be cut, locks can be picked. How does a slave cope when emotional bonds prevent her from freeing herself, indeed prevent her from wanting to be free?

The burden of vulnerability for the slave is as great as the burden of responsibility for the Master. Ironically it is this burden which makes us who and what we are. It is this burden which is sought out and relished by both, and it is this same burden which has the potential to be so fearfully destructive.

In the beginning these emotional bonds scared me. They made me acutely aware of my vulnerability. For quite some time I struggled with the fears and insecurities I felt because of them. Now they are partly the feelings which help drive my enslavement. My deep need to be pleasing to Tanos stems from the tight emotional bonds I feel every minute of every day. Peace comes from trust, and the trust that is built by a Master cushions the fears of a slave until eventually she basks in her vulnerability. She lives her life in bondage.

What happens to the slave should the relationship fail? She survives physically, hopefully she will heal emotionally. The reality is, to this question, I have no answers.

lili (March 2000)